I'm getting OLD.

Last Wednesday I went back to my old high school for my sister's induction into National Honors Society.  First off, am I the only one who thinks this group is some sort of cult?  Anyway.  I was sitting in the remodeled school's indoor courtyard (it used to be an outside courtyard when I attended York) and I had some crazy flashbacks to my high school days.  I could picture myself walking through the courtyard in between classes just to feel the sun on my face for a whole 35 seconds.  Then I did some quick calculations and realized I was a freshman 16 freaking years ago!  Holy CRAP!  I remember it like it was yesterday.  For a good 20 minutes I started panicking.  Where has the time gone?!  What have I done with my life?!  Why am I so fat now?  Why am I soooo old?!  I instantly wanted to be transported back to high school, and relive my carefree days.  But then I remembered my adorable kids at home, and decided that I am one lucky mama.  I'd still give anything to be a size 2 again though.  Ohhhh a girl can dream, right?!

17 year old Betsy.

Then last night we hit up my old favorite bar, Docs.  I have had some of my very favorite (crazy, drunken) nights at Docs.  I was excited to go back and make some more crazy memories.  But instead I had 3 drinks (in 5 hours), yawned the entire time, got annoyed that I had to scream over the music to have conversations, and ended up leaving by 12:30.  It was a nice evening...I liked hanging out with my friends and siblings, but I seriously kept looking at my phone thinking...Brevin is going to be up in 5 hours.  4 hours.  3 hours.  OH GOD I'M SO TIRED!  There was no dancing.  No shots.  No trying to score free drinks (hahaha as if I really could in my current condition!).  No crazy pictures.  No falls.  No plans to find something to do after hours.  All I wanted to do was SLEEP!  Yeah.  Childless Betsy would sleep until 12 or later after a night at the bar.  Current Betsy does not have that luxury.  Damn those kids of mine for needing me in the mornings ;)

Carefree Betsy after a night at Docs.  Ohhhh to be young again!

So yeah.  I'm starting to feel old.  I even woke up with a headache this morning from 3 drinks.  Pathetic.  I told myself 30 was going to be the best year ever.  So maybe I should try to at least squeeze 1 crazy drunken night in before I turn 31...just to prove that I'm not that old...

We'll see. 

Old Betsy. 

Breastfeeding Bust.

Ohhh man.  Poor Brevin was only breastfed for a week before I gave up.  Have I mentioned that I hate breastfeeding?  Oh yeah.  I did. 

Prior to giving birth, I really wanted to make breastfeeding work.  I was even *gasp* excited for it.  But the minute my little man was latched on to my boob, I remembered how much I disliked it.  I toughed through that first week, supplementing a little formula here and there, mainly to keep me sane...and then I gave up.  I pumped a few times a day for the following week to give my little man a few ounces of boob milk, but made a clean cut after my bought of mastitis cleared up.  I was DONE.  The minute I switched over to bottles I had a huge sense of relief.  Freedom!  I had felt like such a prisoner...always breastfeeding or pumping.  Ugh.  I hated it. 

I feel a bit guilty for giving up so quickly...I mean...I at least made it to 5 weeks with Isla (along with supplementing formula)!  But whatevs. 

Happy mama = happy baby. 

And he is seriously one happy baby!

Phew!

No prolapse!

Things got stitched up wrong leaving me with an extra skin chunk where no one would want one...  UGH.  The good news is that it is totally fixable...they just cut it off.  The bad news is that it means more stitches for me in an area where no one should have stitches. 

So freaking annoying!  But, whatevs.  It could be worse. 

In other disturbing Betsy news, my stomach has taken another beating.  Remember when I posted postpartum belly pictures on my old blog after Isla?  Well, things have gotten MUCH WORSE.  Much.  My flesh fanny pack is heading south...fast.  It's so disgusting.  I can't even post pictures of this hot mess.  So as soon as I'm cleared for working out, I will be hitting the gym hardcore and watching what I eat.  But, because the skin is already hanging, it's going to be pretty  hard to eliminate.  Tummy tuck research is already in the works.  Provided we have the finances, I hope to get it done within a year. 

It's going to take a while for me to feel normal and look normal.  It's all a bit frustrating, really.  I don't feel like myself, and it is driving me nuts!

So yeah.  That's what's up with me!  30 is going to be the year I take me body back.  Can't wait!

Frankencrotch.

If Frankenstein had a vag, I can only assume it would like like mine.  Dealing with a busted up crotch is not fun.  It's been 4 weeks and I can't even sit on any surface that is not cushioned.  No chairs.  No benches.  No hardwood floor.  Ugh.  It's so frustrating.  I didn't even have the nerve to look down there for 3 weeks!  It appears the stitches are healing okay, but I've got another issue.  I called the nurse regarding some issues...and let's just say the words VAGINAL PROLAPSE came out of her mouth and she scheduled me for an appointment on Wednesday.  GREAT!  So now my crotch is literally FALLING APART?!?!?!  I am so uncomfortable.  I can't walk without feeling like something is stuck in my crotch.  I was hoping that things were just swollen in there.  But after taking a quick peak...I don't think things are where they should be.  I actually Googled: "What should the opening of a vagina look like?"  Yeah.  Don't do that.  Regret!   I'm obviously hoping I do not have a prolapse...but something isn't right.  I'm dreading my appointment on Wednesday.  Blah.  Keep my crotch in your prayers.  Just kidding.  Unless you like praying about other people's private parts.  Then go for it!

So let's review:

C-Section:  2 week recovery.  The first week really sucked.  After 2 weeks I was feeling good.  Sleeping on my sides and stomach hurt for a while, but it was tolerable.  I missed the first 2 hours of Isla's life because I was in recovery. 

VBAC:  Third degree tear, lost asshole control for a week and nearly pooped my pants multiple times, farted uncontrollably, possible vaginal prolapse from all of the pushing, 4 weeks postpartum and I'm STILL IN PAIN.  I did get to hold my little man immediately after birth...but he was taken from me right away so I could get stitched up for 45 minutes. 


Let's just say I may never have sex again. 

It's pretty much been determined that my pelvis is tilted in a way that makes it difficult for a baby to get out.  Both Isla and Brevin had major cone heads and they both had a very tough time making their way down.  Both of them were positioned funny.  Brevin was posterior, and I'm not sure if Isla was or not...but Isla had torticollis and Brevin appears to also have it (although undiagnosed yet).  In both births, my body was VERY slow to dilate.  Clearly, my body has some issues.  Not cool!

So yeah.  Brevin is my last baby.  I'm cherishing every snuggly moment and trying my hardest not to bite his yummy newborn cheeks off.  The more time I spend with my little man, the less time I spend worrying about my Frankencrotch. 

PS:  I will try really hard not to include the words:  vag, crotch, and asshole in any further posts.

Brevin's Birth Story

*Caution:  Read at your own risk.  My language is totally inappropriate at times :)

Other titles I considered:

1. ....and then my vagina almost exploded.
2. "WHY IS NO ONE LISTENING TO ME?!"
3. "I want a C-Section NOW!"
4. "Guys, seriously.  I know I'm pooping."
5. "What just happened to my butthole?"
6. "STOP!!!  My hip has been DISLOCATED!!!"
7. "I DON'T WANT TO DO THIS ANYMORE."
8. "When you are done with me,  you can sew up Andy's butt too."

I don't know where to start!  Brevin's birth was one crazy event that I'm still processing.  It was intense, exhausting, painful, scary, and amazing.  His birth was so different from Isla's.  I would classify Isla's birth as pretty uneventful.  I slept most of the day from my super powerful epidural, never felt one real contraction, never fully dilated, never pushed, and ended up with a c-section.  Looking back on it, it wasn't that bad.  Not quite sure why I decided to VBAC at the moment...but I'm sure I'll remember eventually :)  Anyway, on with the story...

Brevin was due on Friday September 23rd.  That morning I started having very mild contractions every 4-7 minutes.  I was SUPER excited and hopeful that I would be going into labor on my due date!  Of course, I wasn't that lucky.  After 26 hours or so, the contractions stopped.  Over the weekend I continued to have false labor, but it seemed my little man was perfectly content to stay put as long as possible.  When I woke up Monday morning still pregnant, I was pretty salty.  I decided I was going to try everything I could to get labor started.  Let's just say I had a busy day.  I went to bed that night without any contractions or any signs that labor would be starting.

I woke up Tuesday morning (the 27th) with some mild contractions and knew right away that I was in labor.  I was telling people that I'd be giving birth on the 27th, long before the day arrived...and somehow I just knew it would be happening.  So I texted my Doula, jumped in the shower, and tried to keep my mind off of the contractions.  After about 2 hours of being awake, my contractions started happening 2-4 minutes apart, lasting anywhere from 1 min to 90 seconds.  I got uncomfortable pretty fast, and called my dad to come and get Isla.  My Doula arrived at my house and helped me get through contractions.  We headed to the hospital when I was having a tough time talking through contractions.  At my previous doctor's appointment (almost a week prior) I was dilated to 3cm.  I was hoping when I arrived I'd be at 5...I mean, all of that false labor, plus the laboring at home had to have done something big, right?! 

Holy belly!  40 weeks and 5 days!

Wrong.  Well, kinda.  I was 3-4cm.  Fully effaced though, which was progress.  The doctor didn't want to admit me yet, but they did let me put my stuff in a room (1 of the 2 rooms with an awesome jacuzzi!) so at least I had a room secured.  I walked the halls for about 45 mins?  I'm not sure.  Time gets fuzzy when you are in pain.  Contractions were happening every 2 minutes.  I could hear the nurses talking about how the doctor better admit me soon since I was clearly in pain and in labor. 

Once I was admitted and checked again, I was still at 4cm!  Do you know how frustrating that was?!?!  UGH.  So I jumped in the jacuzzi for a while, but it was hard to get comfortable with the IV in place and the monitor on my stomach.  I labored in there for about 45 minutes before demanding an epidural.  I had wanted to make it to 5cm before getting one, but I was done with the pain.  At this point Brevin was at a -1 station, which is farther down that Isla got, so I felt it was okay to get an epidural since he seemed to be moving down on his own.

It took 2 attempts before the epidural was in place.  The epidural helped to take the edge off but I was still uncomfortable and in pain.  I thought this was normal though, and just dealt with it.  I dealt with it for a VERY long time though.  After many hours of labor I was checked again and STILL AT 4cm!  At this point I totally burst into tears.  Thank goodness I had an amazing, encouraging Doula who helped me labor in different positions to bring the baby down.  Even with the epidural I was able to be on my hands and knees and in a squatting position.  I still hadn't made very much progress so I asked for anything to take the edge off.  I figured if I could just lay and relax, my body would dilate.  I don't remember what they gave me in my IV but it made me loopy and I felt okay for a while.  A while after this I was dilated to a 5.  This was all around 7pm Tuesday night (I was admitted around noon).  I think the doctor was starting to get concerned about my lack of progress.  Getting worried that I'd be forced into a C-Section, I requested a new epidural in hopes of being able to fully relax.  SUCCESS! 

Apparently the first epidural didn't fully take, but the 2nd one felt much better.  I was able to get a few hours of sleep in before waking up to excruciating hip pain.  The pain was HORRIBLE and I couldn't do anything about it!  From then on it was impossible to get comfortable.  I felt it more each time I had a contraction.  At that point, there was some concern about Brevin's position, and the doctor finally determined his face was sideways (?) I think.  I was so damn tired I couldn't think straight.  At this point I was 9cm so my doctor broke my water and I was put in every position possible to encourage Brevin to turn. 

Everything is a little fuzzy at this point.  I know there was lots of barfing.  I started doubting my sanity and my ability to continue.  I definitely asked for a C-Section at this point.  Everyone told me no though, and I was getting increasingly frustrated and physically/emotionally drained. 

Finally.  10 cm!  Brevin was still at a -1 station but it was time to start pushing.  This was 11am on Wednesday morning.  30 hours into labor.  My epidural had pretty much worn off, but everyone said I couldn't have another one.  I was excited that I had made if farther than I did with Isla.  I was winning!  My body was doing its' job!  Woo!

,

Okay...pushing.  I felt everything.  It sucked.  Plus the hip pain was so terrible that I could barely comprehend what was happening.  I totally started pooping right away.  Everyone told me I wasn't...but I could totally feel it.  And smell it.  Sick.  Oh well.  At least it wasn't explosive diarrhea.  The doctor came in around 12 and stayed with me during a lot of the pushing.  I was constantly rotated between 4 positions...2 on my back, and then laying on each side.  I just wanted to lay on my back and push...I was so angry about all of the moving.  Eventually, things started getting pretty horrible.  I was screaming all sorts of crazy things...that I couldn't do it anymore.  That I wanted a C-Section immediately.  That my hip was dislocated.  That I just wanted to stop.  It's amazing what a weird state of mind I was in.  Everyone kept telling me there was no turning back.  I had to keep going.  At that point I demanded my gown be taken off because I felt like I was smothering.  So I had essentially become a naked jungle woman giving birth.  At least that's what I felt like.  I kept telling myself in my head that I didn't want a C-Section and that I just had to just keep going.  (Naked jungle woman = no appropriate pictures of the pushing phase.)

My contractions were a minute apart...no time to rest really.  The whole labor they averaged 2 minutes apart.  Can you imagine??  33 hours of labor with contractions 2 minutes apart?!  I'm so surprised my uterus didn't rupture.

Anyway.  Finally I started pushing like I never knew I could.  I would push and the forcefulness would make me repeatedly gag/dry heave.  The sounds I was making were completely not human, and I was truly in another world.  The doctor left the room for a few moments and after one giant push Brevin was right there.  The nurse ran out of the room to get the doctor, and I was told not to push even though that's obviously all I wanted to do.  Andy and the doctor quickly put on scrubs (Andy got to help deliver) and it was time to get Brevin OUT! 

After a few more rounds of pushing there was suddenly commotion.  I had no clue what was happening.  The doctor announced "OB emergency", the nurse hit a button, a light started flashing and a siren went off (again, I think there was a siren...I was seriously so out of it, I may have made that up).  Andy had to step aside as a team of people literally ran into the room faster than I've ever seen.  At this point I'm hysterical and everyone is just yelling at me to push as hard as I could without stopping.  I had 2 people on each leg pushing it down, Andy said a nurse was evening pushing on my stomach?  It was terrifying.  Brevin was born about 30 seconds later without complication, but his shoulder had gotten stuck in my pelvis, which obviously could have been a big problem.  Crisis averted, thank God!

Brevin was born at 2:21 pm and he was just the cutest little man!  I held him for a while before I needed to be stitched up.  Due to Brevin's forceful exit into the world, and pushing while laying on my back, I tore like you wouldn't believe.  I tore up the front and back through part of my asshole.  Thank GOD the tear didn't extend all the way through.  All of the tearing took 45 minutes to repair.  It was awful.  Andy was holding Brevin and reveling in the joy of our new baby, and I was getting my ass sewn up.  Not cool.  I even told the doctor he needed to sew up Andy's butthole next.  Yep.  I'm classy like that. 

At the end of it all, I was thrilled to have gotten my VBAC and so proud of myself for the marathon that I had just endured.  I would have never thought I had that in me.  Seriously.  It was so intense.  There were so many times I wanted to give up and just demand a C-Section, but I would have totally regretted laboring for that long and then giving up.  I am pretty positive I would have ended up with a C-Section had it not been for my incredible Doula and amazing nurse.  They are the ones I remember by my side.  They kept me going when I didn't think I had it in me.  I feel incredibly lucky to have been surrounded by such great people during Brevin's birth. 

My little man was totally worth all of the exhaustion, pain, and stitches.

8lbs 12 oz 20.5 inches!  Just a tiny bit bigger than his sister...

Welcome to the world Brevin!  You are truly the sweetest, most perfect baby.  I love you tons!

Guilt.

A few months back I wrote a post about how I was struggling with the thought of having a boy.  I am actually quite shocked that I felt that way, and am starting to realize that I was in some sort of major funk for a few months.  I'm blaming it all on hormones.  Sorry Brevin!  You have been wanted and loved all along!!

Anyway!  As much as I miss pink things and pretty outfits, I'm SUPER excited to be having a boy!  One of each seems to be a perfect balance.  Plus I know how much Andy really wanted a son.  Isla has turned out to be a girly girl...exactly what I had wished for.  I'm pretty sure dance lessons are right around the corner.  She often calls me into a room and says "Mommy, look!  I dancing!"  And she proceeds to do a little dance routine for me.  Add that to her love of shopping and dressing up, and I'd say I have my little clone!  Now it's Andy's turn to experience that with his son.  I know he has great hopes for Brevin to be very involved in sports and he can't wait to do "boy" things with him.  I would hate for Andy to miss out on that experience.  It's an amazing feeling to watch your child love to do something that you love doing.  I'm quite positive that my heart may explode from happiness the day Isla has her first dance recital.  (She can start dancing when she turns 3!)

So seriously...best of both worlds!  I'm getting so anxious and excited to meet my little man!  Who will he look like?  Will he have blonde hair?  Will his cheeks be as chubby and kissable as Isla's?  Will he be a good sleeper like his sister?  So many things I am dying to know!

22 more days....

Woo!

Looking Back

I just went back to my old blog and read every single post I had written while I was pregnant.  It was fun looking back on my pregnancy with Isla.  I sort of forgot how lazy I was during June and July of 2009.  I remember being tired, but GOOD GOD, I took laziness to an extreme.  Thankfully I haven't been that tired this time around.  I've surprisingly managed to maintain a good amount of energy on most days.  I certainly have days where I feel like my eyes are bleeding and a nap is completely necessary, but most days I function like a normal person and don't need to get 15 hours of sleep as I apparently needed with Isla.

I do feel slightly guilty that I haven't blogged much about my current pregnancy.  I'm going to try and make up for lost time in my final weeks...

So, let's jump back to when I found out I was pregnant!!

Andy and I had been trying to get pregnant on and off for maybe 5 months?  It wasn't a ridiculous amount of trying, and some months we tried much more than others.  In true Betsy fashion, we ended up getting pregnant during one of our "lazy" (ie: 2 baby-making session) months.  Anyway, the end of January rolls around, and just like I had done the previous months, I go out and buy a ridiculous amount of pregnancy tests.  My period was due on a Friday.  I started testing on the Wednesday before. Wednesday?  Negative.  Thursday?  Negative.  Friday?  NEGATIVE.  UGHHH!  Friday comes and goes with no period though.  Interesting.  Saturday?  NEGATIVE.  WHAT THE HECK MAN?!!?  Now I'm starting to get salty.  Sunday??  BIG NEGATIVE.  Still no period.  GRRRR.  I was starting to get discouraged.  Then, Sunday night as I rolled over in bed I felt a weird stretching pain in my stomach.  It was at that moment I absolutely was sure I was pregnant.  Monday morning rolls around and I finally got my positive test!  Success! :)  Thank goodness!!!  I was spending so much money on those damn tests we were about to be homeless ;)  Seriously, in one month I spent $60 on pregnancy tests.  Ridiculous. 

I was happy that I hadn't consumed mass quantities of tequila while unknowingly pregnant.  I was also happy that we would be moving into a house big enough to accommodate our growing family.  The pregnancy came at a perfect time for us, and we were thrilled with how everything was working out!

My little shopper.

"Bye Mommy!  I go shopping at Target."

This has now become a regular game of Isla's.  She gets all dressed up, grabs, her purse, and gets in her "car" (her princess chair) and drives to Target.  It cracks me up every time!  I'm not sure where she gets the dressing up thing from.  I haven't worn anything aside from sweats and mumus out in public for the last few months.  But more power to her.  She obviously knows that you dress up for Target, and dress down for Walmart.  Smart kid!

Notice the earrings.  So fancy!

"UPRISE!"

Turning 30 was fabulous!  Andy threw me my very first surprise party...and totally managed to keep it a secret!  Usually very little gets past me in this house...so I was happily surprised to celebrate 30 with my family and friends...Hawaiian style!

The day of the party was slightly chaotic. Isla was in a borderline grumpy mood all day and refused to nap, which meant I was exhausted and crabby, which meant the house was a mess and I hadn't showered.  We had a 2:00 play date that I didn't want to miss...so I left the house a complete disaster and headed out to the park to meet Katie, Erin, and their kiddos. 

At the park I asked the girls what they were doing that evening...and they each obviously LIED, but came up with random plans.  Erin had said she was going out to dinner with some friends, and at that point, her son almost blew the surprise!  He mentioned something like, "I thought you were going to Betsy's house for her birthday".  Erin played it off cool and came up with some elaborate sushi plans.  Then after some whispering back and forth between the 2, the issue was dropped.  I didn't think anything of it until I was on my way home.  At first I thought maybe Erin was going out to dinner with Jeannie or Katie and trying not to hurt my feelings and make me feel left out.  Then I started wondering if Andy had something planned...but quickly dismissed that idea.  He is so busy lately I couldn't imagine him having time to plan a party.

By the time Isla and I got home from the park it was around 5 and I had a 5:30 pedicure appointment with Abb.  I kind of felt like cancelling on her due to being so exhausted but Andy insisted I go.  Again, kind of weird since he usually complains about me spending money.  But whatevs.  He also commented on the house, and I'm pretty sure he was sweating profusely looking at what a disaster it was!  Poor guy had AN HOUR to clean the house, set up the decorations, get Isla ready, and prepare the food, snacks, etc.

While Abb and I were getting our pedicures, I breifly mentioned how I thought Andy might be planning something.  Abb did a good job playing it cool and said she hadn't heard of anything.  I believed her and forgot about the whole thing.  One hour later I walked into the house and was incredibly surprised!  Not only was the house spotless, it was completely decorated Hawaiian style!  Isla ran up to me and yelled "UPRISE!" and everyone else chimed in and sang happy birthday to me as I stood their in awe of what my husband had managed to pull off.  He of course had help from my sister and parents, but the idea was all his :)

The only downside to surprise parties is walking in looking like a hot mess.  Seriously.  Very little makeup, hair in a ponytail, and I was wearing cozies.  I had to excuse myself for 15 mins or so to make myself look presentable!  Also, my camera wasn't charged, so I didn't get many pictures :(  But here are a few of my favorites!

I love this picture! 



My BSF and the co party planner

 

Love them!  High school buddies...Katie, me, Anna, and Erin.  We missed you, Jeannie!

I signed Andy up for smiling lessons after reviewing these photos. 

My little munchkin getting all ready for the big "UPRISE"!  (Taken before I got home)

My birthday banner!

The only thing missing from this party (aside from my lovely MN friends) was a yummy margarita!  Andy made me a virgin marg, which was fine...but obvs not the same.  I can't wait for my first delicious margaria post baby.  I'm almost drooling just thinking about it.

Dear Isla,

You went from being my little chubby baby with squishy cheeks, to a hilarious little person in such a short amount of time!  How are you 2 years old already!? 

You are my best little buddy, and a joy to be around.  You love playing with your friends, taking care of your "babies", playing "choo-choos", and going shopping.  Today you put on all of your jewelry, grabbed your purse and your "moneys", and said, "Going shopping Mommy!"  When I asked you where you were going, you looked at me and said, "Ahhhh Target!".  Almost like...DUH MOM!  Isn't that where we always shop?!   There isn't a day that goes by that you don't make me laugh :)

Your personality is hilarious...a definite combo of mommy and daddy.  You love to make people laugh, you are compassionate, fearless, outgoing, and VERY strong-willed. 

Here are a few funny things you've done/said recently:

-You have millions of baby dolls at home.  While the majority of them remain nameless, 3 of them are named Papa Baby, one of them is named Auntie Baby, and one of them is named Princess.  You know exactly which baby is which, and you get mad if I call them by the wrong name. 

-Anytime you see sports on TV you yell "GO TWINS!" regardless if it's even baseball or not.  Your Daddy and Papa Davey are making sure you grow up loving Minnesota sports. 

-You currently have some crazy hair since I'm growing out your bangs.  You pretty much need to wear a ponytail on the top of your head each day or else you can't see!  Each morning you tell me what kind of ponytail you'd like.  Sometimes you request a princess pony.  Sometimes a Kai-Lan pony.  Sometimes even a Barney pony.  Little do you know, these ponytails are all identical, but you take great pride in labeling your ponytails, so we totally go with it. 

-When I listen to my CDs in the car, you are very particular about the music selection.  Some days the only 2 songs you will have us listen to are Cee Lo Green's, Forget You and Pink's, Raise Your Glass.  When a song you don't like comes on, you tell me "NO" and keep repeating no until one of these 2 songs comes on.  Then you yell "YES!!!" and start dancing in your car seat. 

-You often tell me I look pretty, and it just melts my heart.  You will say things like, "Pretty clothes Mommy!", or "Mommy pretty hair!".  You will also tell me to do things like, "Mommy go poop." or "Mommy sit on ouch (couch)."  Since I'm not good at pooping on demand, I typically can't fulfill all of your requests.  You seem to like being in control these days, so I try my best to make you feel like you have some control, but I can't let you run the house :)

Isla, you make me so happy!  I love being your mommy.  You are the funniest, most lovable girl I know.  Thanks for being so awesome!

Love,

Mama

Stuff.

Just when I was starting to get better at blogging, I dropped the ball once again.  I've been wanting to blog about so many things and add pictures with my posts, but I haven't uploaded pictures in forever, and so I keep thinking I'll just blog when the pictures are uploaded...

Here are some quick tidbits of what's been going on lately:

-I turned 30 last week and Andy threw me an amazing surprise Hawaiian party!  No one has ever thrown me a surprise party before...LOVED it!  Even though I walked in looking like a slob and had my hair in a ponytail.

-I have exactly 5 weeks til my due date.

-I am nesting like a mad women.  The fridge has been cleaned, all of the kitchen cabinets have been cleaned and reorganized, the majority of closets have been cleaned out, and Isla's toys in both her bedroom and playroom have been reorganized and bins have been labeled!  With pictures for easy clean up!  Yep, I'm obsessive. 

-Isla's nap and sleep schedule is all messed up.  Seriously, I can't even handle it anymore.  Tomorrow starts day 1 of sleep Nazi camp.  I'm determined to get Isla sleeping normally again before Baby Boy arrives.

-My hormones are completely out of control.  I have actually had to tell myself, out loud, to pull it together and stop being such a sloppy mess of a person on more than one occasion. 

-I am done tutoring.  So sad!  I worked for a great family and I will miss them tons!

-My dad has taken Isla almost weekly for sleepovers, and each night Andy and I spend cleaning,  unpacking (yes, STILL!), hanging pictures, and essentially getting this house completely ready for the baby.  I'm sick of looking at clutter.  I'm sick of bare walls.  I'm sick of dog hair covered floors and half unpacked bins in the laundry room.  I really wish we could actually go on a date, but I know I won't feel content until this house is ready for Brevin (or Sawyer??).

-So maybe we'll go on a date for our Anniversary which is coming up on Tuesday!  3 years already?!  Wow!

So yeah, that's all.

Pregnancy Thus Far...

I'm in week 32.  I'm a monster.  I can barely move without something hurting.  I'm in far worse shape overall this time around.  Only 53 more days though!  WOOO!

According to the nurse I've only gained 16lbs, but according to my own thoughts, I've gained 20.  I thought my starting weight was 155, she said it was recorded as 159. Both weights are equally traumatizing for such a tiny person, but whatevs.  The fact that I've only gained 16-20lbs at this point is remarkable.  I guess cutting back on the ice cream, Oatmeal Creme Pies, Ho Hos, Oreos, and candy bars can really make a difference.  Although my belly is huge.  HUGE.  As are my arms, ass, and thighs.  I'm not one of those cute pregnant girls who only gets a belly.  I expand everywhere.  Anyway, when I gave birth to Isla I was 180.  It was my goal to not exceed this weight.  That means I can only gain 5 more pounds in the next 8 weeks.  Hahahahah.  Not likely.  I'm sure I'll gain 10ish.  Ugh.  UGH.  Okay, can't think about this anymore.  Moving on.

I'm currently weaning off of Zoloft which I'm not very happy about.  My doctor suggested that if I don't desperately need it, I should try to go without it for the sake of the baby.  She assured me that the majority of babies born to mamas on Zoloft are 100 percent fine...but there is a teeny, tiny chance of problems.  So lately I've been a hormonal, impatient, bitch.  The joys of withdrawal.  I already miss my tiny, blue BFF and hope to continue our friendship once baby is here!

Here are a few pregnancy pictures I've taken recently.  26 weeks is the first picture I took.  I'm lame, but I mainly looked fat for a while and avoided the camera at all costs. 


26 Weeks



28 Weeks



31 Weeks

I'm still set on a VBAC, I've got an awesome Doula hired who has had 2 VBACS herself, I'm debating encapsulating my placenta and eating it, and we still have no fricken clue what our kid's name is.  Did the eating my own placenta thing throw you off??  Or make you throw up in your mouth?  I'll write more about that later!

Quickie

My baby turned two.  TWO!!  Holy crap where did the time go?  I will get around to writing her 2 year letter and posting pictures of her birthday party soon! 

For now...here's a sneak peak:

Little Miss Manners

I am obessed with modeling good manners to Isla...as I'm sure most parents are.  Isla has really picked up her polite words lately, and the cuteness just kills me. 

Cha Choo = Thank You
Yo Wawa = Your Welcome
Skee Skee = Excuse Me
PEASE! = Please :)

I love hearing her little voice say "Cha choo, Mama" after I give her apple juice.  Or her yelling "Skee skee cars" when we are stuck in traffic and she wants the cars to move.  Lately she's even gone so far as to say "No cha choo" when she doesn't want something.  So sweet.

A few mornings ago when I went into her room to wake her up (for daycare...normally I would NEVER wake her!) she opened her eyes, smiled, and said "Pretty clothes mama!"  Adorable.  I can't get enough of this fun age! 

She is also starting to use adjectives to describe things.  Her favorites are cute, cool, and awesome.  Seriously hearing her little voice yell "AWESOME!" just makes my day.  At the doctor's office last week she made sure to tell the doctor that I had a "cute baby" in my tummy.  It is NOT just a regular baby.  Definitely a cute baby. 

So yeah.  My kid is awesome.  She still has plenty of tantrums and is refusing to nap almost daily...BUT I'm trying to focus on the positive :)   See...she even knows how to match her sunglasses to her swimsuit.  Pure awesomeness!

Today I wanted to punch a small child in the face.

I hate mean kids.  I especially hate unsupervised mean kids.

Isla and I were having a blast at the Children's Museum today until a nasty little boy, about her age, came up and hit Isla out of the blue.  Poor Isla looked stunned and wasn't sure what to do.  To be honest, I wasn't sure what to do either!  I really wanted to sucker punch that kid and run away with my child, but I comforted Isla and led her to a nearby ball pit.  She seemed to immediately forget her vicious attack, but then moments later the kid ran over to the ball pit and started throwing balls at her!  One of them was a little wooden ball and it hit her right on the head!  Now at this point I'm FUMING.  Isla gets her pouty lower lip and gives me this look like, why is he doing this to me??  Thankfully, his mom noticed the last ball he threw, and ran over and removed him from the area.  No apologies or anything though!  What are you teaching your child lady?!  I make Isla apologize (well technically I apologize for her) any time she accidentally hurts someone (Isla has yet to intentionally hurt anyone!). 

Anyway, my heart literally ached seeing Isla get hurt like that.  I know it's only a taste for what is to come.  As much as I want to, I can't always protect Isla from mean kids and getting her feelings hurt, but I wish I could!

The great thing about kids is how resilient they are!  After a few hugs and assuring her that she didn't do anything wrong...she was back to her happy self.  And just to prove how awesome my kid is: A few minutes later we ventured into the music room and Isla grabbed a few mallets to use on the various instruments.  A little boy walked in wanting to play but there were no mallets left.  I asked Isla to share with the little boy and she walked right up to him and said, "There you go" and gave him one of hers.  She didn't argue with me, she didn't selfishly refuse, she was more than happy to share!  Of course, moments like this make me extra proud to be her mama. 

My kid is awesome.  And she is super cute too!

Letters I'd love to send...

Dear Hemorrhoids,

You are a pain in the ass.  Literally.  I hate you with all of my heart.  You are making me miserable and I'm terrified of what is still to come.  Please retreat back into my ass and hide forever. 

Thanks,

Betsy




Dear Man Who Invented PeaPod,

Amazing work!  Seriously.  Genious.  I love you.  Nothing beats shopping on the couch, and having the groceries delivered less than 24 hours later and carried into my kitchen!  LOVE!   Because of you, I will rarely need to see the inside of a grocery store.  This makes me insanely happy.

Much Love,

Betsy




Dear Angela,

I enjoy beating you at Words With Friends.  It makes me feel extra smart.

Love,

Betsy




Dear Lady at CVS who gave me a dirty look for buying a Mountain Dew,

SCREW YOU!  I strongly believe it was Mountain Dew that made my first child so awesomely smart.

With No Love,

Betsy




Dear Tom,

Thanks for ditching Isla's birthday party.  Isla asked about her Uncle several times.  Remember, I did check with you 2 months in advance to assure you were free on that date.  You are very selfish. I know your phone worked since I saw you called dad on Sunday.  I hope you are scared to contact me.  You should be.  Next time, grow some balls and at least send a text or email saying you weren't going to make it.  Maybe mom really did drop you on your head or microwave you as a baby.  Dad might be on to something...

Betsy

Dear Brevin,

I'm sorry we don't have an official name picked out for you yet.  I'm starting to lean more towards Brevin, but I am very indecisive and I may change my mind.  So I hope calling you all sorts of random names while you are in my tummy doesn't confuse you :)

You have been an awesome little baby this pregnancy.  I complain a lot, but I know people who have had it much worse.  Thanks for not making me barf.  I'd take exhaustion and a general "blah" feeling over puking any day. 

I was a little worried when I found out you were a boy.  I don't know much about boy things...so we'll get to learn things together!  We, however, will not be learning anything about hockey, Boy Scouts, Star Wars, wrestling, or Harry Potter, okay?  But we will do lots of other fun things.  Your sister, Isla, is very excited to meet you!  She has been giving my belly lots kisses and saying, "Hi cute baby!"  You are so loved already and we haven't even met you yet!

I have a few favors to ask of you.  First, please come a tiny bit early.  Maybe just 1 week.  That would be great.  Also, please exit my vagina.  The emergency escape route through my tummy has been closed for good.  (Well, I mean if you realllllllllllllllllllllly need to come out that way, I'm not going to say no!)  Finally, please stop sucker punching my bladder.  Thanks. 

I am so excited to meet you, little man!  September can't come soon enough. 

Love,
Mama

Crunchy vs. Creamy

I hate these parenting terms.  Hate!  Crunchy makes you sound like you have granola hanging from your hairy armpits, and creamy makes you sound like you have a serious vaginal problem.

There have been lots of debates on my birth board at Baby Center regarding these two parenting philosophies.  Moms are choosing sides and often trying to "prove" why their way is best.  It drives me NUTS!  For those who aren't familiar with the terms, crunchy mamas are all about breastfeeding, cloth diapering, organic food, co-sleeping, baby wearing, etc.  Creamy mamas prefer formula feeding, disposable diapering, having their babies sleep in their cribs, etc.  It seems to me that most moms fall somewhere in the middle.  I'm pretty much a creamy mama, at least I was with Isla.  This time around I'm planning on breastfeeding and baby wearing.  Baby wearing seems almost essential with a crazy toddler running around!  I can't imagine myself ever cloth diapering or co-sleeping, but I certainly have nothing against people who do!

Maybe I'm just paranoid, but I feel like the people doing the most judging on the baby boards are often the crunchy mamas who imply that formula is evil, and letting kids cry it out will make them insecure, and that disposable diapers are the devil.  Blah.  I stay away from the debates, but I really just want to punch some of these women in the face for being so disrespectful to other moms!  My way is just as good as your way!  My formula fed child is incredibly smart and rarely gets sick.  She sleeps (at night) like a rockstar, and has since she was 6 months old or so.  She has not grown a beard or an extra leg from eating NON organic foods.

It will be interesting to see how baby #2 influences my parenting style.  Knowing this will be my last baby might make me want to try co-sleeping for a tiny bit so I can savor the yummy baby smell for as long as possible.  Or maybe I'll hate the inconvenience of breastfeeding and I'll start formula sooner than I planned.  Maybe I'll stop shaving my armpits, start playing the bongos and only wear hemp clothing?  You just never know. 

My Glamorous Life as a SAHM.

Me:      "Man, I smell REALLY bad.  And my head itches."
Andy:  "When was the last time you showered?"
Me:      "I have no idea."

Such a glamorous life I lead.  Sweats and messy ponytails.  Napping instead of showering.  Limited adult interaction.  Hours of listening to Baby Beluga on repeat instead of my usual normal music.  Chicken nugget Happy Meals instead of fancy dinners out...

But I totally wouldn't have it any other way.  I was debating going back to work after the little man is born...but I just don't want anyone else raising my baby.  When Isla is in Kindergarten I will most likely return to work.  So I've got some time :)  I feel very blessed to be able to stay at home, and I know Andy works his butt off to make it happen. 

The only bad part of being a SAHM is needing to be self motivated, which clearly I am not.  How hard is it to actually get up and shower in the morning?!  Not hard.  But I sleep in until the last possible second.  If I do decide to shower while Isla is awake, she usually insists on joining me.  So it ends up being an uncomfortable/very fast joint shower.  Sometimes Isla will bring her chair in the bathroom and throw her bath toys at me while I sing The Wheels on the Bus or Itsy Bitsy Spider over and over again.  I'm not sure which I prefer.  By the time Andy gets home, I'm too tired to take a shower, and I tell myself I'll take one in the morning.  Vicious cycle. 

The joys of being a SAHM totally outweigh the bad stuff.  We have weekly, sometimes even biweekly play dates,  I get to teach Isla her basic skills (she is totally rocking her shapes right now and can almost count to 5!), I get to snuggle her, and watch tv with her, and play outside with her, and take classes with her, and I get millions of kisses throughout the day.  It's the best job EVER!

Now I'm off to put my little buddy back to bed, AGAIN.  Ugh.  Nap time isn't going well today!  And I'm DYING for a shower...

Baby Boy Troubles

I am the worst blogger ever.  I have tons going on lately, so it isn't for lack of writing material.  I just don't spend much time on the computer anymore.  I'm starting to feel guilty about not documenting more of my pregnancy though.  I wrote a lot when I was pregnant with Isla, and I posted belly pictures throughout.  I have yet to even take 1 belly pic yet, and I'll be 23 weeks on Friday!  Yikes.  I better get going. 

My little man is doing well.  He is very active and especially enjoys Mountain Dew.  We just  picked out Sawyer's bedding and decided on a theme for his nursery...MONKEYS! 

I like the bedding...but don't love it.  But I didnt' love anything, so I had to pick something I could tolerate.  I really wanted to do a custom made owl/woodland creature room, but it was pricey.  And that is the same theme as Isla's room and Andy wanted something different.  Whatevs.  Do you know how hard it is to find boy bedding that isn't blue!?  The more I look at the damn monkey head, the more regret I feel.  Good thing everything is still in the bag.  I might have to return this stuff.  Ughhhhh. 

I must admit I've gone back and forth between extreme sadness and excitement about having a boy.  If I'm being totally honest, I didn't want a boy.  I have never really wanted boys.  I don't like cargo pants, and wieners, and sports, and superheros, and dump trucks, and blue things, and guns, and wrestling.  So it's taken me a while to get excited for this baby.  Obviously, I love my little man already, but I don't feel any connection to him.  It's kind of sad actually.  I really wanted another girl.  It sucks having these feelings, because Sawyer can't help that he grew a wiener.  It's all Andy's sperm's fault.  I'm just having a hard time getting excited this time around.  Plus the fact that I'm growing a penis inside of me is so creepy.  The thing that makes having a boy tolerable is looking at all the cute pictures of all the little boys my friends have!  They are all so sweet and adorable...I know my little man will be just the same!  Plus I do love that little boys tend to be mama's boys...and since Isla is a totally a daddy's girl, this will even things out!

But I think my little man might either be a nudist or a cross dresser, considering I have been all over searching for clothes for him and have only bought a few things.  Of course I buy Isla something each time I'm out, because I can't resist girl clothes!!  Please tell me why 97% of clothes have animal heads or a sports related theme?  I have no problems with either of these...but I'm looking for some variety!  The only place I have found clothes that I LOVE is Nordstrom.  And I can't afford to pay $25 for a baby polo shirt.  Although Grandpa Dave did buy Sawyer his first pair of non cargo, awesome little plaid shorts at Nordstrom the other day.  The cuteness nearly killed me. 

So yeah.  That's what's been on my mind lately.  Having a little boy is clearly very stressful for me!!  I don't even know if I like the name Sawyer anymore!  This pregnancy is just SO DIFFERENT for me in every possible way.  My little man better stop giving me such a hard time though!  I can't keep spotting or I may end up on bedrest!!  I don't even want to think about that.  I'm actually not tooooo worried about it (shocker!) but I have to limit my activity a little bit and hope it doesn't continue. 

Okay, enough rambling.

My favorite toddler.

Holy crap.  April already?!!?  March flew by!  I'm loving that spring is right around the corner!!  It was 71 degrees on Sunday...the perfect day for a family grill out.  Isla was thrilled to be outside :)

I am having a hard time believing that Isla will be 2 in less than 4 months!  Within the last month she has been saying words I didn't even think she'd know.  Her most recent are Foofa and Brobee (from Yo Gabba Gabba), auntie, uncle, cheeks, baby and choo choo.  So cute!  And instead of saying "bye"  she says "buh bye".  The cuteness kills me.  She is putting 2 words together...like "buh bye dad" or "more fish" (ie goldfish crackers, not actual fish) but that's about as far as her "sentences" go.  It's really amazing to watch toddlers learn, explore, and grow!  But it's amazing how fast they grow up...and how much older she seems compared to last month. 

The panic of having 2 kids is starting to settle in though.  Some days I am SO EXHAUSTED just dealing with Isla...I'm worried how I'll handle 2 kiddos.  Isla's naps have been hit or miss lately, and I'm pretty positive there will be no way I will be able to coordinate both nap times.  So I'm just trying to accept the fact that I will be dead tired for a while.  I originally wanted my kids to be much closer in age...more like 18 months apart instead of 26 months.  Thank GOD we waited a bit longer.  Isla is just getting to the age where she loves babies.  She feeds her baby, tucks her in the baby cradle and says "ni-ni", gives her baby hugs and kisses...it's really the most precious thing I've ever seen.  I know she'll be a great big sister!! :)

I have been the laziest mom when it comes to taking pictures.  When the new baby comes that will have to change.  But here are some random shots of Isla from February.  She's looking more and more like her daddy each day.  The next baby HAS to look a little bit more like me, right?!  I want at least one of my kids to slightly resemble me.  Andy shouldn't be hogging all of the genes!!

I swear her teeth are not yellow in real life!!  But I rarely capture smiles on camera so I'm in love with this picture despite the yellow looking teeth! :)

Second Trimester!

Yay!  Second trimester!  I can't say the first flew by, but I'm happy to be feeling better and slowly regaining my energy.  I'm still dealing with some spotting, which sucks, but it has been pretty harmless.  My heart palpitations have significantly decreased, which has been fabulous.  I got talked into getting back on Zoloft by both my OB and therapist.  I'm hesitantly taking 25mg and praying I don't have an alien baby.  I'm almost 100% sold on the idea of VBAC with the help of a doula.  Those are pretty much my latest pregnancy developments.  Oh, and I'm terrified of dying during childbirth.  Did you know the maternal death rates in the US are on the rise?  Yes.  I realize I'm insane. 

We are 98% set on the names Emmy Winona and Sawyer Harrison.  My family hates Sawyer, but whatevs.  I could care less!  I have been going back and forth with the name Annabelle.  I dunno.  It's a maybe.  We also like Gavin, but it's pretty popular.  And I'm not a fan of anything top 50.  We get compliments on Isla's name all the time!  Random people are always commenting on how beautiful her name is.   This means we have to find an equally awesome/unique name for baby #2.  Talk about pressure!  I think Sawyer fits the bill perfectly in terms of uniqueness/awesomeness...and Emmy is pretty without being popular.  We'll have our final names set by ultrasound day which is roughly 7 weeks away!

I had a dream last night that the doctor told me I was having a girl with a penis.  I was oddly okay with this in the dream.  In my head I was thinking we had the best of both worlds.  Can you tell I subconsciously want a girl?!  I am 99% sure we are having a boy though...which would be equally exciting! 

I think Sawyer and I are off to bed.  I do have things going on in my life that aren't pregnancy related...so I'll try to blog about those later :)

Phew!

Baby is still okay.  We heard the heartbeat via doppler for the first time today.  The doctor didn't give us the beats per minute, but it was fast and steady.  Still no concrete reason for the blood...so I've been instructed to call the nurse each time it happens and both the baby and I will continue to be checked after each occurrence. 

While my peanut baby is resting safely in my uterus, Isla is up in her room screaming and banging her head on the door.  Nap time isn't going over well lately.  In the evenings, Isla has learned that if she screams enough, her daddy will take her into our bed and watch a cartoon with her while they snuggle and drink milk.  Now Isla will throw complete tantrums anytime she is in her room in hopes someone will open the door and free her.  And I will not do it.  Call me the bad mama, but I cannot let Isla think that throwing a tantrum will give her what she wants.  It's frustrating that Andy and I do not agree on this.  Ohhh, it suddenly just got quiet up there.  I guess she either fell asleep or knocked herself out with all of that head banging.

Goodness, Isla alone can be a handful.  I cannot imagine what my life will be like when my little peanut is born in roughly 28 weeks :)

Ugh. Seriously?!

The bleeding has started again.  This time there are some tiny clots which I know can't be a good sign.  It's amazing how the blood waits until evening to make an appearance.  Just to mess with me.  Thank goodness I have an appointment tomorrow anyway to do further testing on the cervical irritation issue.  Currently there is no cramping and bloating as there was on Friday evening.  But I'm starting to fear this could become a high risk pregnancy...or that I could miscarry.  I am really trying to focus on the fact that God has a plan.  He knows what will happen to my little baby, and I really don't have any control over it.  I'm just getting really frustrated because this is all happening when I'm supposed to be entering the "safe" zone of pregnancy.  My baby looks like a baby.  He was kicking his legs!  His heart has been beating!  I don't want him taken from me.  It would be easier to handle had I not seen how adorable and developed my little guy is already. 

Please send good thoughts my way. 

Pregnancy rambling.

I am amazed at how different this pregnancy has been from my last one.  I LOVED being pregnant with Isla.  Aside from the exhaustion, it was perfect.  This time around, I am going crazy already and I'm not quite 12 weeks yet!

On Friday I experienced one of my worst fears: bleeding!  Ugh, so terrifying.  I was super bloated and crampy and totally convinced I was miscarrying.  After a frantic text to Kate trying to figure out what to do (emergency room or wait it out) I called my doctor and he said he would squeeze me in Saturday morning for an ultrasound/checkup.  Yay for Saturday hours!  There is no way I could have waited until Monday. 

I was the last appointment on Saturday and the waiting killed me.  After a quick exam the Doctor gave me an ultrasound himself (no tech on Saturdays) which I thought was incredibly nice!  Seeing the little baby kicking and watching his heartbeat was very reassuring.  The bleeding is due to cervical irritation, although the cause of the irritation is unknown.  I need to go back in for a few tests to figure out what is causing the irritation.  So until we get to the bottom of this, I'm on pelvic rest.  No sex, no working out, no heavy lifting, etc.  If the bleeding continues into the second trimester, my Doctor said there would be a chance this could turn into a high risk pregnancy.  Yikes.  So I'm hoping this all gets resolved quickly!

In other baby news, I took a gender urine test Monday morning and the result very quickly said boy!  I had been thinking boy for about a week prior after having a very vivid dream, so the test totally confirmed my thoughts.  Of course, these tests are not 100% accurate, so it will be interesting to see if it was right.  I've got about 8 weeks of waiting until my ultrasound!  I've already been calling the baby Sawyer (even though we haven't agreed on this name...) so I'm hoping my mother's intuition is right again!  I really had no doubts Isla was a girl long before the ultrasound...so we'll see.  I originally had my heart set on a sister for Isla, but a boy would be so fun too!  Obviously I just want a healthy baby.  I would even take a healthy hermaphrodite. 

It's weird being overweight and pregnant.  When I was pregnant with Isla, I was already showing at 12 weeks.  Now I'm just fat.  Still.  With Isla, I gained 15lbs the first 20 weeks.  And 35lbs the last 20 weeks.  GAG.  GROSS.  I've only gained 3lbs right now, and I'm hoping to gain no more than 5lbs by the 20 week mark.  Without working out, it might be kind of hard...but we'll see what happens.  I'm shooting for a 25lb pregnancy.  I weighed 185 the day I delivered...so my goal is to stay under that!!  I started this pregnancy at 155 so I think that is a realistic goal for me!

So yeah.  That's about all.  I'll start posting preggo pics when I actually have a baby belly!

Attack of the heart. But not a heart attack.

Yesterday I spent 5 hours in the ER because of my crazy heart palpitations.  After many tests it was determined that my palpitations are being caused by pregnancy hormones and STRESS.  Shocker!  Seriously though, having a crucial organ act completely crazy has been very unsettling.  Every 15 seconds or so my heart throws in an extra beat...it's called a Ventricular Ectopic heartbeat.  Most people get these once and a while, and they are totally harmless as long as your heart is healthy otherwise.  So that is what all of the tests were trying to determine...and yes, my heart looks healthy.  Phew!  The only way I can really combat these crazy heartbeats is to eliminate caffeine (which is pretty much done...usually if anything I'll have 1 Mt. Dew in the morning), eliminate stress, and have the baby.  The crazy beats should stop once the baby is born, sometimes sooner.  I've read some people notice a significant decrease after their first trimester.  Fingers crossed that happens for me too!   Having your heart wake you up in the middle of the night because it is pounding and racing uncontrollably reallllly sucks.

Okay.  Complaining done.  I hope this little baby becomes kinder to me soon.  Today I have a random burst of energy, and I'm only 10 weeks.  I'm hoping this lasts!  Andy will be confused/shocked/elated to find the house in a somewhat clean state today, and the mountain of laundry washed and put away!  He has pretty much done EVERYTHING around here.  Well, everything except for the resting and TV watching.  I've got that covered. 

30 weeks left!

A tired, lazy post.

I. AM. SO. TIRED.  Seriously.  Exhausted.  This little peanut baby has been stealing all of my energy.  The house is A MESS.  There are boxes everywhere.  Nothing on the walls.  Mountains of laundry.  Crap cluttering every possible surface.  Ugh.  This is no way to live!  But seriously, during my free time...all I do is lay around.  I'm not tired enough to sleep, but I'm far too tired to clean.

I have every intention of blogging more frequently.  But my computer is in the cold basement.  Not very inviting after a long day.  Since Andy is out for the night, I stole his laptop and I'm trying to catch up on blogs and Facebook posts.

Anyway, in a brief, bulleted fashion, here is what is up with me:

1.  New house = major problems.
2.  I'm having crazy heart palpitations and chest tightness.  Most likely due to hormones and stress.  EKG, Echo, and Holter monitor scheduled on Tuesday.
3.  Isla had her EEG today...I'm praying for good results!
4.  This pregnancy is far harder than my first.  I swear I'm having a boy.  Although I'm secretly hoping for another girl.  But it will totes be a boy.  I just know it...and I'll obviously be insanely happy either way!  Plus I think I like our boy name a little more than I like our girl name.  
5.  Isla is a daredevil/crazy child.  She will climb up anything.  I am in the bathroom for 30 seconds and come out to find Isla on the dining room table.
6.  VBAC vs repeat c-section.  Yikes.  Terrified of both.  Can I somehow burp up this baby?  Or poop him out?  These truly sound like better options.

I'll elaborate more in future posts.  Right now, it's time for bed!

Home Sweet Home

Home!

Not sure why this one is so blurry?  Anyway, check out the death staircase and the lack of a banister where the stairs curve.  Also there is no coat closet which is slightly problematic. 

The kitchen isn't very pretty...but it's much bigger than our current kitchen!

Master bedroom.

Isla's bedroom.

Upstairs bathroom.

Part of the basement.  Notice death staircase #2.  The open door leads into Andy's office. 

Huge laundry room!  I'm in love. 

Lovely fenced in backyard!

That is a quick glimpse into our new home!  It is 3 bedrooms and 2 baths, 2200 sq feet on a 1/2 acre of land. Oh, and there are more closets/storage areas than I've ever dreamed of.  The lack of a coat closet, however, is slightly puzzeling.  We have train tracks for both the metra train and freight trains directly behind us though.  My dad's house has tracks behind his house and we got used to the train pretty quickly.  These trains will be far more frequent, but I'm hoping they won't be bad! 

We'll have a guest room, so everyone is welcome to visit :)

Oh, and the tacky furniture is not ours.  We obviously haven't moved yet...and we probably never will if I don't get to packing!  Packing with a toddler running around is near impossible!  Isla either wants to take everything out of the box, or sit inside of it!  Thankfully I have a babysitter watching Isla at my dad's house today and tomorrow from 1-6pm so I can finish packing. 

Please remind me never to move again.  This is so exhausting.  This will be our 5th move in 7 years (my mom's townhome, MN apartment, MN townhome, IL apartment, and now our new house.  EXHAUSTING.